Blog Hill

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

A Hypothesis

I've got this hypothesis, that is yet untested. Contrary to popular belief, outgoing "extroverts" actually enjoy social interaction less than "introverts" or whatever you want to call them. Maybe because more is expected of socially confident people, and maybe their higher energy relational style costs them more? I don't know. I'm just putting this out there. What do others think?

posted by The Borg at 9:32 PM

18 Comments:

  • I'm outgoing and I'm and extrovert.

    I LOVE social interaction.
    At least, I think I do...

    By Blogger RodeoClown, At 9:43 PM  

  • Do you initiate interaction or do you respond (albeit in an outgoing way) to other people's overtures (I think that's the right word)?

    By Blogger The Borg, At 9:58 PM  

  • I'm told the "real" definitions of "introvert" and "extrovert" actually relate to where you get your energy from. An "extrovert" needs social interaction otherwise they feel drained, an "introvert" needs time alone otherwise they feel drained. Most people sit somewhere on the scale between those two extremes.

    What's interesting is that how outgoing they are isn't actually a sign of how introverted or extroverted they are. A very outgoing person can be quite introverted, their outgoingness just leaves them feeling a bit drained and they need to get some time by themselves.

    So in terms of what you're talking about - yeah, I think there are plenty of outgoing people who would normally be called "extroverts" that really are drained by socialising. I'm not sure it's related to the fact they're expending more energy socially though - more to do with the fact that kind of interaction doesn't refuel them. An outgoing, extroverted person won't end up feeling drained because while they're expending social energy, they're replenishing it at the same time.

    Expending social energy? Did I just write that? How did I descend into such wank?

    By Blogger Swil, At 10:18 PM  

  • I love and need social interaction, yet I find it difficult and draining. I would call myself introverted.

    By Blogger Bron, At 10:33 PM  

  • Swil's definition is correct. An extrovert is not necessarily an outgoing person.

    I agree with your hypothesis though.

    The way others see you affects the way they interact with you. If people perceive you as outgoing, your friends and aquiantences will speak to you with the assumption that you're going to respond in an "outgoing-fun-friendly-whacky" way. This would obviously make social interaction "draining" if you were not feeling that way.

    I think I can relate to the flipside of your hypothesis. People expect me to be shy and not a fan of socialising, so people are more reserved when speaking to me. However, I actually enjoy interaction and sometimes feel drained if I don't get it.

    By Blogger Cabernet Leather, At 11:59 PM  

  • I initiate interaction (I think... I'll have to check next time I do it).

    I'm definitely energised by social interaction, but I'm also outgoing.

    School and uni holidays (though I loved the break) used to leave me feeling completely drained due to lack of interaction.

    By Blogger RodeoClown, At 9:12 AM  

  • I'm my own worst enemy. I love and crave social interaction... but I find it draining to the point of burnout.

    The solution to this I found is to take time out for myself on my own riding my bike, reading blogs, taking naps and talking with Christine all of which help me to stop burning out

    By Blogger mike, At 10:16 AM  

  • Slow you didn't say where you fitted into the paradigm...?

    By Blogger mike, At 10:17 AM  

  • I'm going to guess Slo's an outgoing introvert.

    Whenever I do (reputable) personality tests I find I'm borderline introvert/extrovert, which seems to match up with the reality. For some odd reason I feel the responsibility to keep group conversations going and lively, which I enjoy doing, but I also quite like it when other people are handling that and I can just sit back and listen cos the former can be tiring. I generally swing back and forth between the two extremes quite quickly...

    I think I just fear social silence. Someone pointed this out to me the other day - they said I'm a "hmmm'r" (ie I fill silences with useless noises).

    By Blogger Swil, At 11:29 AM  

  • This is a tough question. I think I'm one of those guys who enjoys socialising but doesn't feed off it. I think I get fed by a certain amount of socialising. But too much and it becomes draining. I often find myself getting suddenly very tired after massive social events.

    By Blogger Angus, At 2:58 PM  

  • I totally feed off time on my own. I enjoy social interaction for a while, but not in too great a dose.

    When we did mission last year we were living in each other's pockets for 15 hours a day. By the end of day 10 I was desperate for some solitude.

    By Blogger Craig Schwarze, At 3:44 PM  

  • A wise man once said:

    "Do you need some time...on your own?/Do you need some time...all alone?/Ooh everybody needs some time...on their own/don't you know you need some time...all alone"

    By Blogger Cabernet Leather, At 4:10 PM  

  • Those words sound even wiser when Slash breaks into a guitar solo.

    By Blogger Swil, At 4:45 PM  

  • Wise words Pryderi. They do sound even more wise when Slash storms out of Axl's wedding to the trashy bride and into the desert... all alone.


    AWESOMELY, the word verification for this post:

    "drunkz"

    HA! It's in a great font that looks a bit tanked as well!

    By Blogger Angus, At 4:48 PM  

  • My hypothesis is that the introverts think more deeply about their social interactions -- reflect on them, blog hypotheses about them, that sort of thing.

    By Blogger Radagast, At 5:38 PM  

  • I never understood the clip - was Slash in love with Axl's bride or what?

    By Blogger Craig Schwarze, At 6:15 PM  

  • Ha ha Angus, that's awesome.

    Shaun is right. I guess I'm an outgoing introvert. But not all social interaction is draining. It depends on whom I'm interacting with?

    By Blogger The Borg, At 9:05 PM  

  • Some people, while existing in a state of social acceptance, are boring as all buggery to talk to. Attempting to do so is draining.

    Other people, while not so much in the class of society's elite, are not boring as all buggery to talk to. These people usually have an opinion, and if they don't have an opinion, they are trying to form one, and as time progresses, develop each opinion. Talking to such people, is, I find, stimulating.

    Then there are the boring buggers who have no social skills. I find talking to myself draining.

    By Blogger BSJ-rom, At 3:29 PM  

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